Thoughts about “Ironic” by Alanis Morrisette

Okay.

So people like to point out how none of the things in the song “Ironic” are actually ironic.

Listening to the song I don’t think that that is actually 100% true. I don’t find any of the verses to be great examples of irony but there are a couple scenarios that do project some degree of actual irony.

As with anything I choose to over-intellectualize it and turn it into a game.

So let’s go item by item!

old man turned ninety-eight, won the lottery, and died the next day (small irony, just in that dying on any one specific day is somewhat unexpected.)

black fly in your Chardonnay (no)

a death row pardon two minutes too late (this is more incompetence than ironic.)

rain on your wedding day (people worry about it raining on their wedding days all the time. specifically because it is not unexpected and not ironic)

free ride when you’ve already paid (not really)

good advice that you just didn’t take (minor irony, if you know something is good advice and have identified it as such you could reasonably be expected to follow that advice. Not following that advice which you know is good could in some small way be seen as ironic)

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
“Well isn’t this nice…”                                                                                (I find it a little ironic that he thought that the plane crash was nice…)

A traffic jam when you’re already late (no)

A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break (no)

ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife (this one is tricky. If it was just a spoon when you needed a knife I would side with Morrisette since I would expect all of your cutlery to be in one place. However. TEN THOUSAND SPOONS. It sounds to me like you are in a spoon factory, lady. There is probably a sign that says SPOONS THIS WAY over the door and stationary that says SPOONS INC. I don’t think this is irony. I think you’ve brought this on yourself.)

meeting the man of my dreams and then meeting his beautiful wife (no)

Okey doke.

So there wasn’t too much irony there after all. But I am still glad we did this.

And I think that we can all agree that the most ironic part of the song is every time Alanis Morrisette pronounces figures as “figgurs”.